Good Evening Readers,
I know its been awhile since I posted last but honestly I was really embarrassed and disappointed in myself with the things I stuffed my face with! Let me just say it included pizza, cake, chips, cheese stuffed pretzels, etc. It was awful! Today I started my real life diet. I have decided that the easiest thing for me to do in order to really lose weight is to choose a diet that works for me and something I can stick to. I have an app on my phone called "my fitness pal" and it allows me to enter my current weight, my goal weight, and how many pounds a week I want to lose. From there it tells me how many calories I can eat a day. In order to keep track of this I enter what I eat into the program and it tracks how many calories I have consumed. What makes it so easy is that because I have a smart phone I can scan the bar code on the food and it will automatically tell me the nutritional values. I can also enter in any exercise I do and it counts that into the equation as well. It is almost fool proof which is great for me!! If I actually lose the amount of weight I chose for each week than I will let you know that the program works.
I am not ready to disclose my current weight (it is really that embarrassing) but I will say that I qualify for weight loss surgery because I am so far above the ideal weight for my height. It is really hard to admit that I am considered....morbidly obese. Even typing that phrase brings tears to my eyes. I can't believe I have let myself get to this point. I'm not sure why I am so fat or what brought it on but I have literally been fat since I was about 4-6 years old. I wish I could say that I used to be thin and gained weight because at least then I would know what it felt like to be skinny and "beautiful" by society's standards. I have never felt ugly because I know my face is decent and for the most part I dress in clothes that flatter my body type but for once I want to know what it feels like to fit in a pair of jeans below a size 20 (I think I was a 16 once but that was a lifetime ago). I want to know what it is like to be able to shop at stores like American Eagle or hell even Macy's without them wanting to put me in elastic waist bands. Sorry this has turned into a woe is me diatribe but I just got really emotional and needed to purge myself of these feelings...at least for tonight. Thanks for listening!!
My fitness pal is a great website. You just have to be careful that you are not relying heavily on what they say you are burning doing certain activities since we all burn different calories. Try getting a heart rate monitor so you know for sure what you are burning if that is important to you. I am hoping to pick up one soon.
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